Sliced Bread 2: The Greatest Thing Since Sliced Bread

Today I said to Greyghost, "How come nobody has useless powers?"

"Pardon me?"

"Everybody who has super-powers has powers that are really useful for crime or fighting or something. Nobody has the power to make a really good pizza, or to go for three days without taking a whiz, or to automatically pick out songs for a mixtape that add up to exactly ninety minutes. It's all flying around and fire and magnetism and stuff. Why?"

He thought about it.

"Even when I had powers," I continued. "They were weird, but still pretty tough."

"Mm."

"You don't know, do you?"

"No, I don't. It's an interesting question, though; I had never thought about it in those terms. I presume you have a theory?"

"Huh? No. I really wanted to know. It doesn't seem like the kind of thing that could happen by accident."

"Mm."

And we left it at that.