Sliced Bread 2: The Greatest Thing Since Sliced Bread

Tonight I was sitting with Greyghost's grappling-hook gun in pieces on my desk, wondering if I could fix it myself or if I had to send it out to Itzhak. Then Greyghost called.

"We're coming in. Have coffee ready." Click.

We're all about etiquette around here.

I made coffee, and five minutes later Greyghost and Perseid came in. Perseid had her helmet in her hands.

"How's everything?" I asked.

"The man tried to kill me," Perseid said.

"Which man?"

"We were stopping Screwball and some of his men from robbing an armored car. I was doing the work on the ground and Perseid was taking on Screwball and providing air cover."

"I swooped in, and whenever I blasted one of the bags of money to make the guy drop it," she said, "Screwball--he's got all these things floating and bobbing around him telekinetically, like manhole covers and buckets and machetes--whipped a bowling ball right at my head. He could have killed me." She sounded astonished.

"What did you think he was going to do?" I asked her.

"It's just a robbery," she said. "It's not worth killing anyone over."

"He's a supervillain. They do this."

"I know. Nobody ever tried to kill me before, though. It's . . ." She took a sip of coffee. "It's startling."

"You mean scary."

"No. No, I wasn't scared. Just surprised. It took me so long to react that Screwball almost got away on his floating manhole cover."

"It didn't take as long as you think. You did fine."

"Really?"

"He wouldn't say so if it wasn't true," I said. "Actually, I'm surprised he said so at all."

"Anyway," she said, "next time I'll be ready." She looked down into her coffee cup. "A man tried to kill me tonight."

I would have been scared. 'Startling.' Is she kidding me? A supervillain drifts a bowling ball at my head, and I'm out of there. There'd be a Dennis-shaped hole in the scenery and a small sonic boom.