Sliced Bread 2: The Greatest Thing Since Sliced Bread

the other night after i was finished posting the last entry i went to find perseid. it took me a long time. eventually i caught up with her on the roof of the bar. she was looking up at the sky.

'what's going on qm' i said.

she flicked her tail but didn't say anything.

i glanced up to see what she was looking at. there were streaks of light shooting across the night. 'what the hell's that qm' i said.

'it's the perseid meteor shower,' she said finally. 'that should be me up there.'

'huh.'

she stood up, yawned and stretched. 'come on,' she said. 'i've had enough of this. we need to make a plan.'

safe again in the basement, we tried to get our ideas in order. 'what kind of a plan do we need qm' i asked.

'i think we should have a good one,' perseid said. 'i think i remember that it was better to have a good plan than a bad plan.'

i was getting rusty when it came to human thinking. but i figured she was probably right. 'okay. what do we want to do qm what's our plan for qm'

'hmm. good question,' she said, and thought about it. 'how about fish qm we could make a plan to get some fish and i could eat the fish.'

there was something wrong with that idea. although i could eat fish too. 'no,' i said. 'here's what we want to do. we want to be human again and we want to stop redburn from doing whatever he's doing.'

'that's right,' perseid said. 'that's good. and here's what. redburn can make us human again. so if we stop him we can make him turn us back.'

brilliant. 'okay. so how do we do that qm'

'we find redburn. then i sneak up, pounce on him, and bite him.'

'that won't work,' i said, 'he's a dragon. he's too tough.'

'hmm,' she said.

we were silent for a while. then i spoke up. 'i have a crazy idea,' i said.

'let's hear it,' perseid said.

'the computer in the office has an internet connection. i could send an e-mail to bob. then bob could get a hold of mr. scarab. mr. scarab is kind of a magic guy. so he could come and change us back. then we could figure out what to do about redburn after.'

'yeah,' she said. 'yeah, but if bob knew where we were he'd come and kick me and throw things at me.'

'and he'd probably step on me,' i said.

'probably,' she said. 'that's what they do.'

we thought some more. 'wait a minute,' i said, 'we may have that wrong. bob's our friend.'

'right.'

'so maybe he wouldn't step on me. maybe he'd want to help us.'

'maaaay-be...'

'i think so. it's bob. he's our friend.'

'do you want to take that chance? just show yourself to a human? it's too dangerous.'

'you should talk. it's a lot less dangerous than it is for a little kittycat go run up to a fire-breathing dragon and bite him on the ass.'

'it's also a lot less dangerous than your saying that to me,' perseid said, and pounced. then things got kind of confused for a few minutes and our discussion was shelved sine die.

i might still send that e-mail, though. i don't know. really perseid's right. it'd probably just lead to me getting stepped on. we're safer the way things are.